Where are you, I said.

Right here, I answered.
Which is where I've always been. Not that I know where that is , exactly.
But there's only one thing to do: soldier on.
Soldier on.

Not prone to bouts of neurosis, my ass...

Indeed.

choosing a career

There are two main variables in scoring a career choice:

Expected return of income, and satisfaction.

Satisfaction is hugely nebulous, and at the same time I recognize that it must be weighted much more than expected return of income - or perhaps more accurately, expected return of income needs to have some sort of math-y thing done to it that I'm in no state to phrase out that expresses its diminishing value as y as we increase income along x. They are both variables, but satisfaction is of much more importance.

[unfinished]

new pickup line

Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really well, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you're giving me your number because I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I'm careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That's just too sad. Think about the children. For God's sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let's just keep it sexual, because we both know where it's going.

Was walking

Was walking to the 20 bus stop at the loop today, and my thoughts were on interest and goal and purpose and career like they so often are. And I realized that what I'm interested in is behaviour, the behaviour of humankind and of individuals, and what I want to achieve is a a better standard of living for those with less opportunity through no fault of their own.

And that's the disconnect I so often see in business, I think. That's the disconnect that I've so often felt.

[unfinished]